This page is intended for those who are at the beginning phases of a miscarriage. Many times, people find that they leave the emergency room or their provider's office with their heads spinning. They've been given information and perhaps a menu of options of what might come next, but when they get home they find themselves wanting more. They might feel they need more facts or may be desperate to know what this experience might be like. Some just feel really alone and need comfort that others have been through this.
To help answer some of your most pressing questions, we wrote a booklet about the various emotional and physical experiences that can accompany a miscarriage. This booklet is written by our Empty Arms community of parents who have experienced a miscarriage, and answers questions such as “What might a miscarriage feel like?”, “What happens after a miscarriage?”, and “Where can I turn to for support?”.
You can always call your provider.
People sometimes wonder, "Is my question important enough to warrant an after-hours phone call?" The answer to this question is YES. Across the board, YES. You can call your provider and ask whatever questions you have, and you should not hesitate to do this. If you have a question that needs answering, your provider may very well have the information you need, and he or she may be able to spare you the worry and anxiety that will come from wondering on your own. Remember, they are on call for a reason.
You can call on Empty Arms
Many people have reported feeling confused and alone after leaving the hospital or office and wished they had someone they could talk to for emotional support and just to say, "What was your miscarriage like for you?"
We have a system set up to help you get this help easily. You can choose from among these three options:
Text 413-570-0811 and send the message "Miscarriage Support". When we receive this message, we will have one of our miscarriage support leaders give you a call back as soon as she possibly can.
Call us directly: 413-570-0811. If we don't answer, leave us a message and we'll call you back. We are available to help to talk you through your options, your anxieties, and your feelings on a peer level.
Send us an email explaining your situation and what you'd like help with: firstname.lastname@example.org
Beyond telephone support, a companion may be able to come to see you for an in-person visit if this would be helpful. We encourage you to reach out if you're feeling isolated and would like support.
You can learn more about what this experience might be like for you
Most of us know that statistically, miscarriage is not uncommon. But most of us have never actually talked to someone about their miscarriage and what it was really like for them. There is loads of information and there are hundreds of stories available on the internet, and below we've just selected a few that might be particularly good to read in the early days. We can't guarantee that you'll relate to them, but it can be a start.
We've known many people who have just appreciated drinking in as many accounts as they can about other people's miscarriages. It can make us feel less alone. Below are links to a number of collections of stories that might give you even more perspective.
Here is a collection of 10 different stories that could possibly speak to you.
A local author's story Catherine Newman's account of her own miscarriage.
There's a collection of three stories here.
Huffington Post did a live interview with six families here, if you've got the time to watch.
This last one is a story of a woman's miscarriage that happened in public. If this happened to you, you just might need to know you aren't alone.
Don't forget as you browse and read that there are living resources available to offer you support and information.
There are many women in your community who have experienced early pregnancy loss and if speaking with one of them might help, Empty Arms can provide that resource.